Eagle Shredder

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This country just never runs out of reasons for me to love it. Take this truck that whizzed by me this morning. This photo is a touch blurry, but hopefully you can make out the giant Bald Eagle shredding documents and dropping them in a trashcan. This is a most excellent logo. It says, “That’s right folks, The Great Bird of America will come right to your office or home and shred your sins to tatters with its powerful talons.”
If only Jeff Skilling had found this evidence-destroying raptor in time. It is not easy to train a bird for this kind of work, but the payoff is well worth it. Skilling hired a team of 25 Guatemalans to come up to the 30th floor of Enron and jam thousands of papers into giant shredders by hand. But this was dumb, and they obviously didn’t do a very good job in the end. Any smart man would’ve hired a magnificent Bald Eagle to shred that evidence.   A hungry eagle can shred 320 reams an hour if you whip it into a proper frenzy. Don’t make the mistake Skilling did…

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1 Comment

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One response to “Eagle Shredder

  1. That’s great you should send it to Leno

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